Dear Winter

UNACCEPTABLE

ACCEPTABLE

The Abbreviated Update

ab.bre.vi.at.ed -- adjective

1. shortened; made briefer
2. constituting a smaller or shorter version of

The long and short of it is, things have changed. Life is changing, often faster than I can keep up with. So I'll try my best to get everything out as quickly as I can, before things turn upside down on me all over again.

• Brayden and I are separated, and in the process of getting a divorce. Some of you have heard rumors, but now it's official. Let it be known that this is no one's fault. We both still love each other very much, and we're still the best of friends. But it wasn't the right time, and we will both be happier in the end. Morgan, Greta, Sarah and Chelsea, you have all been exceptionally supportive and helpful. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

• I'm living at home now, but not for long. On January 25th I'll be heading south to Orlando to work at Disneyworld! The silver lining in all of this is the wonderful new opportunities that are now in front of me. I've been offered a job with the Disney College Program, so my spring semester will be spent in the happiest place on earth! 

• I am actively working on my book, for once :) I'm on track to be mostly, if not completely, finished by the time I leave for Florida. If I'm not finished by then, I apologize in advance to my roommates.  Listening to me complain loudly and vehemently about people who don't actually exist can be entertaining, but a little confusing :)

So that's done. Now we're all on the same page. Love to you all, and Happy Holidays.

If you give a procrastinator a Pinterest...

... she will want some pins to go with it :)

And then any meager semblance of productivity she'd managed to cling to will go flying out the window.

Behold, a trend I didn't know I needed, but now can't go without :http://pinterest.com/shuttlebug/

Let it Snow! or "Twas the night before this morning"

Twas the night before ... morning ...

And all through the house

Not a creature was stirring

Not even a mouse.

My parents were nestled

All snug in their beds

With pre-Christmas panic

Nightmare-ing their heads.

But with me in my PJs

And warm stockinged feet,

Downstairs I had crept

To prepare them a treat

While sneaking around

In the warm Christmaslight*

I hung flake after flake,

A snow paper delight.

*Christmaslight - n - Here defined as any light, glow, or reflection caused by objects relating to or in association with the celebration of winter holidays, namely Christmas. ex: candles, Christmas tree lights, roaring fires, the hazy glow from a streetlight partially obscured by falling snow or ice

The Little Things

People say that it's the little things in life that can make you happiest. No argument there.  However, what gets at me is how often the little things can also completely ruin your day. Or your week.

Why is it that in a life where things are falling apart right and left, the thing that brings me to tears is that there's not enough hot water for my bath? All I wanted was one hour to relax with a book, some good music and some foamy, scented, bubbly goodness! Is that too much to ask? Just an hour, so I can forget about everything else that sucks right now!

It's a mark of how close one is to the edge when it takes something so little to send one off into an emotional breakdown.

Words and Rhymes

How did it get so late so soon?

It's night before it's afternoon.

December is here before it's June.

My goodness how the time has flewn.

How did it get so late so soon?

~ Dr. Seuss

Ok, just for a second, can we talk about what a perfect word "flewn" is? Thank you, Dr. Seuss, for such a beautifully absurd rhyme! It almost tricks your brain into thinking it's a real word for a moment. Clever little flewn!

Also, shouldn't the past tense of "spite" be "spote?" The past tense of "smite" is "smote," so it stands to reason ... Look, "spited" sounds ri.di.cu.lous.  If you did something out of spite, or to spite someone, you should be able to say at the end of everything, "Yes, I SPOTE him!"

A Whole New Level of Awesome

Cleaning products have now reached, as suggested by the title, a whole new level of awesome.

Ladies and gentlemen I give you, COLLECTIBLE TINS!

Yes, that's right, you can now purchase your "Finish" brand dishwasher tablets in a special "collect all seven" collector's tin! Why? Because we as a species are ridiculous! I mean, what a way to promote your item, but seriously? Are we really going to go out of our way to get all seven dishwashing tablet tins? (Gee, doesn't that just roll right off the tongue.)

I could understand when they started making jam jars into collectible glasses. They're already the right shape, and they add a touch of whimsical to your kitchen. But these tins?  A foot tall, 7 inches wide and an inch deep? I'm racking my brains for a creative way to re-use them ... and believe me, I will find it. Because I am, in fact, in possession of one of these tins. I have NO idea how I'm going to make it useful, but I am darn well going to try! It's too good of an opportunity to pass up.

Ideas anyone?

Sunday Plans

Eight AM church ... one of the less enjoyable things about visiting my parents. In "my world," church doesn't start until ONE PM!

However, the GOOD thing about having early church is that now, I can actually have a life after church, rather than getting home just in time for dinner. So I'm spending the afternoon re-learning to crochet.

I tried to learn once before. It didn't work out too well. But I'm optimistic this time, so we'll see how it goes! I can hardly be worse than I was last time ... can I?

On a side note, Pandora Radio is a beautiful thing. I sense another ode forthcoming. Stay tuned.

Ode to Netflix

When, in the empty days of summer

My husband is away, in class, on campus

And my house is empty,

I turn to my trusty DVD collection.

But, alas, I have watched them all already.

Woe is me, for I am too poor to buy any more.

But hark, what's this?

Netflix Instant Watch, live from my XBOX?

Oh joy! Oh bliss! Free movies for me!

Thank you Netflix, you forever hold a special place in my heart.

TOAST!

Welcome to today's episode of, "YOU KNOW YOU'RE MARRIED WHEN..."

Today, we here at YKYMW would like to focus on the joy of kitchen appliances. Specifically, the toaster.

Exhibit A: Behold the cheap, dollar-store toaster that the couple in question HAS been using.  Only two slots, meaning if both parties have two pieces of toast, they can NEVER eat breakfast at the same time!  This toaster is two years old and STILL smells like burned rubber every time it's used.





Exhibit B: The NEW toaster! Behold, this shiny temple of dials and wires.  It was given as an Easter gift by the wife's parents just this past Sunday, and the excitement it has caused in this household rivals that of Harry Potter fans lining up to get tickets for the latest movie.

Ladies and gentlemen, strange things happen when you get married. Things that may have been important in the past suddenly cease to be quite as cool as getting a new gadget, or having all of your laundry done.

Disturbing

Some friends of mine are co-directing a play at the local middle school.  So, surrounded all day by 10-12-year-olds, yes?  

Yes.

They discovered last week during rehearsal that none of them have ever seen CINDERELLA!

...

EXCUSE ME?!?!

I'm highly disturbed by this.  Parenting fail.

Project Mode

I've been getting that itch again.  The need to create, to build, to MAKE something.  Of course, the problem with my creative impulses is that I'm truly not all that creative.  I don't have the natural gift for color composition, or beadwork or sewing or even cooking.
And so, I often find myself sitting amidst a mess of fabric, string, and hot glue, DESPERATELY trying to make something appealing, or remotely attractive.

It rarely works out that way.

So tonight, I decided to start small. I'm heading into summer break and, with the exception of one class and the Maymester Musical, I'm going to be relatively free. I've already decided to spend much of my time learning new recipes in an attempt to become a better cook, but now I've added the crafting aspect to my Homemaker Training.

Anyway, here was my project of the night. I don't have a "Before" picture for you, so you'll just have to imagine the lamp without fringe.

I think it went rather well.  However, it's the only one of my projects tonight that did :( Since Brayden is off doing important pre-med homeworky things, I stayed in project mode.  And now, I have to go clean the kitchen.


... Like I said, THIS was the only project that worked out ... Including my dinner.

Starving Bookworm

Brayden recently finished reading a 1,000+ page novel that he got for Christmas. When he was finished with it, I finally had to undertake the daunting task of re-organizing our bookshelf.

Let me rephrase that : re-organizing ONE of our FOUR bookshelves! We are filled to bursting with books! Which is fabulous, believe me.

Except tonight, when it's not.  Because as I was shifting and sliding and trying to fit all of our glorious tomes of goodness into their places, I realized just how many of them I haven't read.  I used to read all the time.  As a kid, I got grounded from reading when I was being punished, because it was the thing I loved most, and who cared if I didn't watch TV? No big deal. But when I couldn't read...

Now, I'm always busy. I have homework and rehearsal and cleaning and cooking and laundry ... and by the time I go to bed every night, a place where I'd usually read for a little while before going to sleep, I'm too exhausted to get through even one page.

So my point?  I miss reading.  I am a starving bookworm, desperately and selfishly hoping for a summer vacation that DOESN'T include me working, so that I have the time to read.

Ciera : A Haiku

In honor of National Blog About Ciera Month:

to rock the cello

and T.A art history

takes mad awesome skills